A New Year's Resolution for a happier new you

Every year on December 31st at exactly 12 o'clock midnight fireworks light up the night sky, champagne corks pop, horns and whistles blow, hugs and kisses are exchanged and well wishes for a Happy New Year greet  people all over the world. Most people view this annual end of the year ritual as a chance to start the new year with a clean slate.

Habitually, some people make New Year's resolutions, but I wonder how many of  these  resolutions are actually holdovers from previous failed attempts? We tend to regurgitate the same resolutions year to year hoping for a different result. According to Clinical Psychologist John Norcross: 

New York, New York

Approximately 50 percent of the population makes resolutions each New Year. Among the top resolutions are weight loss, exercise, stopping smoking, better money management and debt reduction.

Berlin, Germany

Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Sound familiar?  Millions of people are stuck in this perennial revolving door of making new year resolutions, only to break them days, weeks or months down the road; and revert to the same old way of doing things, to the same habits they promised to change. Let's be honest. Our  human efforts at self-improvement are at best superficial, external, and also destined to fail every time. Psychology professor Timothy Pychyl says that resolutions are nothing more than a form of cultural procrastination :

[In] an effort to reinvent oneself, people make resolutions as a way of motivating themselves. People [really] aren't ready to change their habits, particularly bad habits, and that accounts for the high failure rate.

Then, there are those who believe in willpower (how's that been working for you?). If willpower alone were all one needs most people would have succeeded with that first diet or the first time they tried to stop smoking, drinking, using drugs or whatever else they tried to will themselves to stop doing. Face it, a resolution by itself has no power, according to author S. Michael Houdmann: 

Resolving to start or stop doing a certain activity has no value unless you have the proper motivation for stopping or starting that activity. 

For a resolution to succeed, however, it will  take more than proper motivation. Once you decide you want to make a change— you might make a specific plan, take specific steps, get organized, carve out time, seek peer or professional support but unless you have spiritual resolve you will fail.

A changed life

Spiritual resolve acknowledges that we are creatures created by a loving God for a purpose. As such, we are ultimately accountable to our Creator. Spiritual resolve must undergird any desire we have for a changed life.  Without spiritual resolve and God's help, our human efforts are nothing more than  a house built on sand.  The Bible explains it this way:

When someone becomes a Christian, he becomes a brand new person inside. He is not the same anymore. A new life has begun! 2 Corinthians 5:17 TLB

Trust in God alone for the power to change  by surrendering your old life in exchange for a new life in Christ. You don't have to go it alone trying to make life work. You have a helper to guide you. And you won't have to wait until next December 31 at 12  midnight to take advantage of God's offer. You can begin your new life right now with your sins forgiven and a chance to start your life over. Wishing you a Happy New Year, and an even happier new you!

 

A Christmas Day miracle: When death took a detour

"Miracle - A surprising and welcome event that is not explicable by natural or scientific laws and is therefore considered to be the work of a divine agency."  Webster's dictionary

I have always believed in miracles, and hoped for them in my life from time to time. Looking back I can think of a few divine interventions in answer to my prayers, but there is one that tops them all — the miracle I experienced in 2002 on Christmas Day.  I have never forgotten what the Lord did that day. I have vowed to re-post my story each Christmas so that some reader may find hope and comfort in knowing that God is with us to the very end. The following is a true account of my Christmas miracle.

By 2002, I had been caring for my mom for 22 years during her long battle with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). By far, our toughest battles came that year. MS had taken away my mom's ability to speak and made eating and swallowing difficult. At the same time, mom started having seizures that became life-threatening. As a result, she was hospitalized and given high doses of the drug phenobarbital to quell the seizure activity. We finally left the hospital after 12 days, just three days before Christmas.

Although mom couldn't speak, her eyes said she was glad to be back home. We both were. After making her comfortable in bed, I checked the newly inserted feeding tube in her abdomen, and left her room feeling a little exhausted. When I returned, I noticed that mom was staring intently  toward the window in her room paying no attention to the fact that I had reentered her room. This was not like her. I was standing at the side of her bed, calling her name, and she didn't even notice me. Instead, she continued to focus on the window at the foot of her bed. Oddly, she had the most radiant glow on her face like nothing I'd ever seen. It made me think that she was seeing something that my eyes could not see. So I stood there silently waiting until she finally turned to notice me. I asked no questions of her as I prepared to bed her for the night.

The next morning the home-care nurse came by to check mom's vital signs. After she left, I bathed, dressed, and transferred mom to her wheelchair. She was a little weak but happy to be out of bed after the long hospital ordeal. We had lost some ground in our fight against MS during this latest hospital stay, but I told mother that we were not going to let MS get the better of us; we were in this fight to the end. Later that afternoon, sitting in her wheelchair, mom closed her eyes and slipped quietly into an unexpected coma. It was Christmas Eve.

I knew things didn't look good at that point, but I made the decision not to take her back to the hospital. She had made her wishes known in a Living Will and I was determined I would honor it. Going back to the hospital was not an option for us. It was mother's wish and mine that when death came, he would find her in her home. Even so, I held out hope that somehow mom would pull through as she had done in the past. I called for the home-care nurse, but she never came. Next, I called my older sister, and waited. During the long hours that I was alone with mom, I held her hand and talked to her. I believed that even in a coma, she could still hear me. Later that evening, my sister joined me in a bedside vigil for our mother. Together we watched, her knowing more than me, that imminent death was poised to take our mother from us. I remember talking about keeping mom hydrated and needing Pedialyte from the drugstore. My sister volunteered to go. It was after midnight when she left for the 24-hour pharmacy just a few blocks away. She was gone for an usually long time, which made me wonder if she was somewhere crying? I looked out the window.  It was snowing. I realized then it was Christmas Day.

Returning to mom's bedside,I continued gently stroking her arm and squeezing her hand. As I did this, I was startled by how ice cold she had suddenly become— like the life blood had drained from of her body. I checked to see if she was still breathing. She was, but just barely. Her breathing had become shallow and raspy like air escaping from a tire. I hurried to the other side of the bed to check her 1,000 ml drainage bag. By now, it should have been full from all the fluids she had been receiving through the feeding tube. Instead, it was empty except for reddish-brown residue in the bottom. My immediate thought was that her kidneys had shut down. For the first time during this whole ordeal, I allowed myself to entertain the real possibility that mom was slipping away— that death was imminent. I wasn't ready to let go, yet I didn't know what else to do. So, I cried out:

"Mom, it's Christmas. Please don't die on Christmas Day."

Suddenly, I got the urge to go to the bathroom. When I returned mom's bedside moments later, I took hold of her hand again. I noticed that something was different. Her hand, which was ice cold only moments ago, was noticeably warmer. My hands began to work their way around the rest of her— arms, legs,  feet, forehead—her whole body was now feverishly hot. I quickly hurried to the other side of the bed to check the drainage bag. To my surprise, the drainage bag that had only moments ago been empty was bursting beyond its capacity with pale, yellow urine. At that moment, I was struck with the stark realization that God was in the midst; had He heard my plea and had performed this miracle. God stopped death in its tracks.

Only God can make death take a detour. Knowing my mother, I imagine that there was some  negotiation between her and God that day just outside the gates of Heaven. I can picture her holding up one finger and saying to God, "Please Father God, let me go back for one more night?"  
And just like that HE granted her request.

Mom died the next day on December 26 that afternoon. My sister and I were together as mom breathed her last. This story could have ended there were it not for Jesus Christ, who came into this world so that we could have life. Because of Jesus, life doesn't end in the grave. Whoever believes in Jesus Christ has eternal life. I can't wait to see mother again I want to ask her what really happened on that fateful Christmas Day.